Basic Beat

Well, another week has now begun.

My favorite color, green, has been taken to a whole 'nother level. I guess it just takes a little extra something to really make it pop! I have to say that the last weekend was by far my favorite weekend of the year.

But I really feel like a lost and broken, incomplete person. And slightly on the lonely side. Thank God for friends!

And papa Fernando Bernal is just plain amazing! Haha!

My plans are sooooo messed up right now. I have no clue what I am doing. Should I continue on, throw caution to the wind, or hold back, and risk never knowing?

I wish I could spill, but something is holding me back.

Fear.

I am scared. What do I do? God is working on me right as I write. Putting these thoughts on paper (or at least pixels) is helping to organize my feeling a little bit.

Why does this always happen? I feel like I am on a roll and things are going my way, and all of a sudden I feel like I am falling off the tightrope and back into dismay. I finally made it to a point where I was ready to reach out, and now I feel disconnected.

Or maybe the thought of a relationship just leaves me with the reminder of failure...